The White Sox suck so why not look to better things to waste your time on?

By: @chi_rox_

Building IKEA Furniture

Let’s face it, we’ve all had IKEA furniture. I am fairly confident they furnished my entire first apartment-their stuff is cheap (just like Jerry Reinsdorf!) but not terrible quality. Despite this, I think we all have that one piece of furniture that took years off our lives trying to put together.

From missing a needed screw to trying to decipher their shitty directions, IKEA really stretches us to our limits. But those limits are nothing compared to those we stretch watching the 2023 Chicago White Sox. They always seem to be missing a key piece and fail to understand the assignment, so might as well focus on getting some pretty furniture set up with that time, right?

Going to the DMV

The DMV might be truly one of the most soul-sucking places on earth. From employees that have zero patience for anything to needing 40 forms to prove you’re a real human-we all understand the chore it is to dedicate a morning to hitting up the DMV.

Regardless, it STILL beats watching Chicago White Sox employees be terrible at their job. Each outing requires 3-4 hours of your time, but at least once you leave the DMV you don’t have to worry about going back for another year, unlike the White Sox, who need you back the very next day.

Getting a Root Canal

The dentist is a highly disliked place to be, especially if you need extended work done. Root canals are painful, annoying, and lengthy-just like White Sox games. At the very least when you’re done with a root canal you feel proud knowing you got it done. The White Sox seldom bring a feeling of pride and accomplishment after their games; in fact, many people feel worse. Now why would you put yourself through that?

Being on a Plane while a Baby Screams the Entire Time

Plane rides are often a less than ideal use of your time. They have you cramped inside a flying tube with no exit strategy and minimal options to entertain yourself. Now enter a baby who is screaming at the top of its lungs because it has no other way to communicate. Everyone is doing the best they can usually, something the White Sox cannot currently relate to. When you exit the plane you’re at least, usually, in a better spot than when you took off-another thing the White Sox cannot say for themselves. Overall, we are not enjoying the ride.