By Sam Reeves

Nikola Jokić is the greatest NBA player I have seen since Paul Zipser. The All-NBA Denver Nuggets Center is all the rage in the league right now after leading the Nuggets to their first Western Conference title in team history. The man who is a walking triple-double and internet sensation should be doing even more. Not on the basketball court, he’s got that down I think. No, I want to see him doing…ordinary things.

I want to see Nikola Jokić doing something simple, like his laundry. Think of how humanizing that is. Just a dude, doing his laundry, just like you and me. Except this dude is 7′ plus and incredibly athletic. Even still, HE also needs to bring quarters to do his laundry! (Read that in John Mulaney’s voice).

I want to spend a day walking with Nikola Jokić through a random city and see how many people ask him how tall he is. I once walked around with a guy who is 6’10” and he was stopped every 45 seconds by someone asking him how tall he is. The worst part is that you can’t even get mad about it. People are going to get terrified that the Hulk got mad for asking how tall he is. I don’t even think I would be able to keep count. I would just be so mesmerized by the amount of attention someone that tall constantly gets. WHY ARE TALL PEOPLE SO INTERESTING?! I’m not angry. I am incredibly curious, because I, too, need to point out a tall person. Why do we do that? No stop it, we aren’t doing this here.

I would love to see Nikola Jokić host a family barbecue and work the grill. This big goofy guy working the grill, firing up those burgers and dogs. Rocking the white and blue New Balance shoes, cargo shorts, and that sweet Harley-Davidson t-shirt. Nikola Jokić probably grills like a champ. Those nights he is feeling dangerous, he’ll throw down a rack of ribs and smoke those bad boys. He’s watched so much Guy Fieri and it SHOWS. That’s a good thing, you need that flair and flavor profile.

I want to see Nikola Jokić enter a Crispin Glover look-alike contest. I am not saying he looks exactly like him, but enough for someone to consider it. It’s most noticeable late in games when you start to see him get tired. His face kind of smushes together more and it’s quite Crispin Glover-like. I may be wrong, but I don’t think I am.

Lastly, I want to see Nikola Jokić ride a unicycle. The largest man just riding a unicycle would freak people out. Not only because he is a giant, but because of his balance. That’s a dangerous human if you truly think about it. Riding a unicycle would probably make him laugh too. Nikola Jokić being a silly dude on a unicycle would be the most wholesome thing I’ve ever seen. Nikola, start those lessons buddy, you’ll make a killing.

I’m sure there is more I want to see Nikola Jokić do. Like winning the NBA Finals this year. That would be cool. The man is an anomaly and a brilliant basketball player. I truly hope we get a ridiculously good NBA Finals matchup and the world gets to see Jokić in all his glory. He does kind of look like Crispin Glover. Don’t overthink it.